Judge Me...

For sentimental reasons, there are few things that make me more anxious than excited.

I look forward to homecomings and being in places with back stories.

***

One of the hardest things in life is to judge. In one context, the bible tells us not to judge. That's a different story.

As part of my job, I was tasked to judge essay writing contests that our office conducted. There were actually four. The very first was, in a way, very sentimental. Aside from my sister is a head of one of the departments in that school, the place was my father's hometown- Abucay, Bataan. In my younger years, I just could not get how persistent my father was for us to visit where he came from. It is only now that I understand desire for the children to know their roots. In the next two contests, I was not at the contest venue. They just delivered the entries in the office. The last one was equally sentimental. It was such a challenge that I have to be in Mariveles, Bataan at 8:00am, where my father served as Municipal Treasurer for couple of years. He already resigned by the time he had me and then moved on with plenty of business misdeals. Until his later years, that (being Municipal Treasurer) defined who he was.

Of the four contests, one thing was common. Determining who had the best interpretation of the theme "Ikaw at Ako Tungo sa Wastong Pagrerehistro" was easy. I could even not take them seriously. It's just that I made a conscious effort to think that this may mark a milestone in one constestant's life. Sure, ours may not be the most prestigious contest in the country but I foresee that the winner would likely remember that in his lifetime. 

***

On my part, the first time I was invited to be a contest judge, I somehow declared to myself, I indeed arrived. Seriously or not, it takes integrity and expertise to be invited as one. Anyways, the very first judging task I got was for a barangay, ehem! amateur singing contest no less. In as much as I wanted to set my mind to be objective, there's nothing I can do when I learned that one contestant is a close relative. The best that I can do was to hope that people don't get the connection. Anyways, the last names were different.

We almost were not able to go home alive. In every Filipino contest, it is inevitable to claim that the result was luto (fixed), which in this case is quite true.

***  

The other judging task was to judge the Best Muse for the school's Intramurals. There were few things I remember about that experience.

1. That I got big pack of "samba" chocolate as token of appreciation.

2. That a member of the organizing committee interviewed me for my credentials. Obviously for introduction. On my left is a modelesque lass and on my right, seemed to me, a local beauty queen. At the middle, I'm a member of the faculty. I was not invited because of my expertise in beauty but because there has to be someone judging from the school. The worse, the program ended with the host forgetting to acknowledge even our mere names.

3. I was at my most objective because none of the candidates was my student.

4. The best muse winner turned out to be the candidate I gave the lowest score. This candidate was in a cocktail dress. Intramurals, remember. Another worse, when she becomes my student the semester after, she thanked me for making her win.

***

The most recent was judging the "Faculty Got Talent" of the same school. Explanation: "Pilipinas Got Talent" - only the contestants were members of the faculty. For the earlier part, the first task was to judge for the performances of the students as final term requirement in Physical Education Class as sidelight. Two years ago I was part of the same contest as a contestant. They instructed us that we had the will to choose our talent spot. Everyone chose to sing. That confused that audience when I performed my piece - poetry.

As for my experience as a judge, there was nothing really difficult about it. I don't have a close friend among my co-teachers which gave me the liberty to score objectively. What bothered me was the party's master of ceremony. In instances he runs out of things to say, he repetitively reads the names of the judge. In the entire duration of the program, we were at least introduced fifty times.

*** 

Sure, ours may not be the most prestigious contest in the country but I foresee that the winner would likely remember that "win" in his lifetime. 

I know right because I was. There is nothing more sentimental than judging the same essay writing contest I won 19 years ago.

Richard Guevara the Photographer 2: Not Quite Getting There

I'll be very persistent that I will NOT be a photographer. Let just say that I take pictures - or I have to take pictures because I cover our office's activities as part of my job.

Recently, we got access (not really access, I just can't find the correct term) to a government website for us to contribute on a regular basis or at least as the need arises. With that, my mindset is to take pictures on a journalist's point of view instead of Facebook frenzy.

What are these things? When my boss is on a speaking engagement, I have to take good shots of: 1.  her in serious speaking mode, 2. the backdrop for people to know where is she of what activity is it,  3. a glimpse of audience to determine how many people attended the event -all of these in one frame. Simple, Newstory accommodates only one picture in newspaper or in this case, news website. 

Nonetheless, I can't help thinking about what I can be as a photographer. With every activity I attend to, I try to capture images on the artistic side - at least on my standard. With some aspects of photography, this is to show how I progress - or how I don't.

1. Photojournalism.

2. Portraits.  

3. Landscape. 

4. Food Photography

EARLY RETIREMENT

At 35, it is too early to retire. Uhmmm.. it depends to the retirement. 

One month ago, I decided to stop drinking alcohol for good. 

***

I dunno know. Anywhere you go and whoever you're with, it is inevitable that you talk about on drinking session, when you learned to drink and how much you can at your peak. Thus, sharing it with you means telling the same story for hundredth time. 

People get the impression that I'm a heavy drinker. Thank to the genes.  For quite some time I can say I was a lasengero (drunkard), but the heavy drinker was and has always been a trick. I can stay uplate and upright in the sessions primarily because of strategy.  

Drinking was the last thing that's expected of me when I was young. My father didn't drink at all. People must have thought that I was in very wholesome set of friends to learn about that. I have always believed in trying to fit in is not a negative trait but  I always know who I am. Drinking is something I did because of peer pressure and but realized that it's part of who I really am. I really love conversations and being carefree to show where I come from. The best of all, it gives excuses to be mayabang which something I kept away in real life. 

My earliest memory of San Miguel was around high school. For odd reason, there were left over beer in the ref after fiesta. I asked my aunt if I can have it. When I tried it, I didn't like the taste and dismissed the possibilities that we can get along in the future.

Fast forward 2014 - at 35 years old, I am saying goodbye to a significant part of my life, which is possible as I see it.

***

I list down few highlights of the things I remember about.

1. I always brag about not blowing at the session table. That's true because I can manage to do that in the CR, come back and pretend nothing happened.

2. In my late teens when no one was inviting me for a drink, I buy on my own. I drink beer in can alone inside the CR in our home.

3. As I remember, It was only twice that I was not able to go home because of being drunk. The worst was I really don't remember what's between the town fiesta where we drink and my friend's room where I woke up.

4. I stood as groom's man once on my friend wedding where the inuman started after lunch. Among the barkadas I was the only one who were there early because I was of the part of the entourage. I had to join the groom's other set of friends. By around 5:00, I started texting my friends - Putsa nasan na kyo? Lasing na lasing na ko di pa rin kayo dumarating!

5. It was on my 21st birthday that first time na may inuman courtesy of my brother who was in first first job by that time. On my last birthday, he also prepared for the inuman when I no longer. I just join his friends but I was never convinced to take even a single drop.

6. My first official taste of gin was at my friend's house. I usually find his father taking his daily sip of alcohol whenever I go to his house. He once asked me if I do drink. The next thing I remember, my brother and sister had to picked me up because I was so wasted. On our way home, my kuya does not want to alalay me. he told me, that's something I have to learn - to still manage to walk home. My sister on the other hand was asking if I have a problem. I don't have a problem. I just took the opportunity of the first time I was offered to drink. I had seven shots.

***

Anyways, our office has a benefit for annual medical exam. I availed of that last December and found out my creatinine is beyond normal. The next day, I join the office's social party and decided that the Red Horse I drank that night was my last.

This was around the same time an office mate underwent his first sessions of dialysis.